we are moving (gulp) to california!
that's right. i said it. it is official. and now, of course, the sorted tale:
a year ago, while vacationing in michigan, scott and i took the first step on what would prove to be a long journey. we opened our hearts, minds and futures to being part of a new office opening in san francisco. when we first evaluated it, it sounded crazy. today, given the current state of the economy, it sounds even crazier. in fact we've been told we are insane by friends and family members alike. and while that has been difficult to hear, our motivation for doing this isn't rooted in something we really have "control" over.
you see, when scott proposed this idea, the first thing he said was: "we're only going if it is where God wants us." immediately, i was on bored. knowing that my husbands heart was seeking a posture of obedience was a deal sealer for me. and so we began to pray. scott let the san francisco project leader know that we were seriously considering it and we began to take steps towards seeking God's will.
the journey has had its ebbs and flows, if you will...
post nursing depression- not so much feeling like i want to move across the country
cost of housing in the east bay- not so much feeling like i want to move across the country
a trip to california in november with snow on the ground in il and sunshine in ca- let's go
my mom lying in a bed with an uncertain future in richmond- not so much in favor of moving
discovering we were expecting a baby- not really inclined to start packing boxes
discovering the baby was due at the exact time we thought we'd be moving- no way!
but as we prayed about this all over the month of december, we kept feeling like we were being told to "just walk through the open door". neither scott or i felt like God was saying, "yes! i want you in calli. GO." we simply felt like he wanted us to be open to the next step. and so step by step we went forward. to say that i went eagerly is inaccurate. often, those were the most painful steps i can remember taking in my lifetime. but with each step, we kept feeling the nudge to take the next one. we negotiated a moving contract with scott's office, we remodeled a bathroom, we transformed a playroom into a dining room, we organized every closet/cupboard/cabinet in sight, repaired a leaking basement... etc. through all of it, we also juggled traveling back and forth to help out in minor ways with my mom, adjusting to the approaching arrival of baby three, two kids, and life in general. it has been a tiring 6 months.
in june, after 90+ showings (do the math- that means cleaning my house at least 3 times a week for 6 months... sometimes more) we received an offer. it was sad. essentially, at the end of the day, they wanted us to pay them to buy our house. and to make matters worse, the negotiations were slow and drawn out over 9 days. and eventually, we walked away from the deal.
at that point, all signs pointed to this being the end of the road. statistically speaking, your first offer is always your best. when looking at the timeline, we were quickly running out (our contract with our realtor was to expire july 15th). and so from mid-june on, we kind of felt like the door was closing. and the minute that i began to feel like we were staying in chicago, i suddenly realized that in my heart, i really wanted to move. it felt crazy because all along i had been so unsure. it was frustrating and i spent a lot of time trying to figure out the take-home God wanted me to have... because in my mind this deal was done and we were staying put in Chicago.
the last week of june, i looked at scott and said, "wouldn't it be funny if we got an offer in the 9th inning?" i was mostly joking, but for some reason, i had this feeling that God hadn't closed the door.
on June 30th, we received an offer on our house. it came from a couple that we ironically have two connections with (out of all the people in the chicagoland area???). the number we settled on... the exact number we needed.
isn't God amazing?
and even more amazing is that He put up with me through all of it... my complaining, my doubt, my confusion, my frequent moments of failing to trust, and my extreme desire to control the situation. at the end of the day, His plan was way better than mine. go figure, the God of the universe knew what He was doing after all:)
2 comments:
Beautiful!!
I believe that He gives us all the opportunity to "practice" the gifts that he has given us. You for example have been open, patient, and strong. Congratulations to all that you have achieved!!
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